Closing Days
Dear Friends in the Passion, this posting is my last article which will appear in the final Passionist Newsletter called The Passionist Spirit. The newsletter has just been readied for mailing and will go out in the mail on Monday, December 20, 2010. I thought I would share this article with you online...
Today as I sit at my desk it is the First Sunday of Advent but by the time this reaches you we will either be on the verge of a New Year or the New Year will have begun with all its hopes, dreams, graces and blessings ahead of us waiting to be lived. And the Passionist Spiritual Center will either be in its last days of ministry or the doors will have closed with memories of the past 45 years still fresh in our minds.
This last year has been one of the most difficult stretches of time in my life. I would have to say that the only time more difficult in my life was waiting for my father’s death some 28 years ago. Back in May 2010 during the Passionist chapter when the vote was taken to close this Spiritual Center and its ministry, the end seemed a long way off. There was much to do, many issues to address, questions to be answered, retreats, days of recollection, special celebrations to be planned and prepared. It was going to be a busy time, the end was a long way off and there was little time for thinking, reflecting or feeling.
I threw myself into the tasks at hand. I prepared the letter that was sent to all retreatants to announce the closing. I worked on the summer newsletter and made sure it had all the information that people would need to move on once the Center closed. I talked with staff, volunteers, associates and any retreatants who called or stopped in. I tried to answer all notes, letters or emails sent my way. Fr. Michael and I talked often about the coming retreat season and planned how best to celebrate the closing retreat so that it would help all who came to celebrate the gift of this place, the Passionists and the Spirit of Christ’s Passion. I even led a group of mostly retreatants on a wonderful pilgrimage to Germany, Austria and Switzerland during which we attended the famous Oberammergau Passion Play. It was a wonderful trip filled with many great moments and memories. Yes, life through the summer and early fall was busy and the ending seemed a long way off!
I have to say, being busy and focused on many things seemed to be the right tonic for making it through these last days, weeks and months of the Spiritual Center as we know it. Yet, here I sit at my desk; papers piled everywhere as usual, December right around the corner, a new Church year beginning today and on the brink of the last month of ministry here at the Spiritual Center. There is still much left to do but today I am lost in thoughts of the ending that will now too soon take place!
For the past eleven plus years I have sat at this desk with energy for life because of all that I have experienced as director of this Spiritual Center. Wonderful moments when I encountered God’s presence through people sharing their life and faith, seeking reconciliation, celebrating the Eucharist or sitting quietly in prayer. I have been touched by God through smiles, tears, embraces and kind words. I have found the presence of God in young people preparing for confirmation, high school students sharing their struggles, hopes and dreams, women and men of all ages stepping out of their busy lives to celebrate retreat. I have been energized by God’s love through the generosity, gratitude and faithfulness of the many people young and old who have walked through the doors of this Spiritual Center.
January 1, 2011 has the making of being a very difficult day in my life. It will be an ending. It will bring closure to a part of my life that I have poured my heart and soul into for the last eleven years here and almost 30 years as a Passionist. It will be a loss of good ministry, good friends, good community and a special place. However, as the preface for a funeral mass states, “Lord, for your faithful people life is changed, not ended.” In these closing months I have stressed this faith statement over and over. Our retreats from September to December have not been wakes or funerals; they have been celebrations of retreat! Celebrations that have focused on “the spirit,” “the gift” that this place and all who have ministered here have been for the last 45 years. The “Spirit,” the “Grace,” and the “Gift” of the Passion of Jesus Christ, God’s greatest act of Love for us!
The scriptures for the First Sunday of Advent talk about being ready, being awake and being prepared along with the serious consequences that come with not be ready, awake or prepared. However, the readings especially the first reading from Isaiah also talk about envisioning something new, something special, something wonderful. For Isaiah it was envisioning a world at peace, where war was a thing of the past. A central theme in these First Sunday of Advent readings is that life cannot change for the better unless we envision it first. Yes, we have to work at it, but first we have to see it!
One of the wonderful blessings of the Great River for me over the years is that it has always helped me to envision the gift and presence of God in my life. Knowing God is near has helped me make it through the difficult and struggling times of life. This last year has been about bringing closure to this place but it also has been about envisioning something new, in the world, in the Church, in the Passionist Community and in my own life. Perhaps a mistake I have made over this last year was not visiting the gift of the Great River and God’s presence in my life more often. My vision has only been closure, loss, ending rather than in the presence of the Great River, seeing change, beginning and a wonderful new Spirit of God!
Over and over again, the Great River has taught me that change is necessary. The constant presence of the Great River speaks of change and new life each day. Sunrises and sunsets, the ebb and flow of tides and currents, the changing of seasons all speak to God’s continual creation bringing about something new, something wonderful. Yes, on January 1, 2011 life will change for all of us, but it will not end. The gift of the Spirit of Jesus Christ’s Passion will live on in our hearts and we will let that Spirit help us to envision and live something new!
Friends, in the Passion, life for us has changed but not ended and as I have said at the end of each retreat this fall it is not good-bye, it is until we meet again! Many blessings and much peace in the New Year and always!
Peace in Christ’s Passion,
Fr. Paul
Comments for Closing Days
Evelyn Foley
Dec 23, 2010God Bless you and your staff for all your hard, attentive, caring work! I hope the future brings you all nothing but success and contentment.......... Merry Christmas and A a Blessed, Healthy, Happy and Peace Filled New Year!
Guy Stella
Dec 29, 2010We are very grateful to God and the Passionist Community for sharing the Passionist Retreat House in Riverdale with us for the past 45 years. Thank you Father Paul and Father Michael for modeling for us your strong faith, commitment and spirituality. You are both great preachers and confessors. You have touched many lives. May the years ahead bring you joy and success in all that you do!
Jodine B. Romano
Jan 04, 2011I feel a part of the Passionist Community - though I have never been to the Center. Also - questions: what will become of those of us who rely on your prayers? Will we still be able to purchase Mass cards? Thank you for advising. . . and thank you for your generosity to so very many of us who are far, far away.
francis john kane
Mar 26, 2011As I move on the journey He has sent me upon, i came to this Passionist website. I was born and grew up, under the care of the Passionists, in a small town, Dunkirk, NY. I witnessed the loss of a Passionist Monastery there, and the loss of the Passionists in Pastoral care at St. Mary's Parish (now St. Elizabeth Ann Seton) within the Diocese of Buffalo. I once was asked in the confessional, following confession, if ever I had considered a vocation to the priesthood. I also remember the fond and respectful way in which my earthly father talked about the wonderful priests and sisters, who had educated him and brought him through formation at St. Mary's Academy in Dunkirk. I also remember the sadness, and disappointment in the world, I saw in my father's face when he told me that Fr. Aidan English (a Passionist, who had been in Dunkirk and working the Holy Spirit's will) had been murdered by an intruder in NYC. I now presume this was in the Bronx. The Passion of Christ continues to inspire us. I shall endeavor to visit the graves of the Passionist Brothers and Priests buried near the shore of lake Erie, when i return this Summer to WNY to bury my mother and father. i thank G-d for the Passionists. If there is good in me, they have had a hand in it through my father, or directly with me. francis